24-7 Vision

In getting our 24-7 prayer room set up, I found this "poem" that was written by Pete Greig from the first ever 24-7 prayer room. This was and is his vision for this movement. I hope that it will become our vision and focus as we move together in prayer.

The Vision
So this guy comes up to me and says "what's the vision? What's the big idea?" I open my mouth and words come out like this…
The vision?

The vision is JESUS – obsessively, dangerously, undeniably Jesus.

The vision is an army of young people.

You see bones? I see an army. And they are FREE from materialism.

They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.

They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday. They wouldn't even notice.

They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way the west was won.

They are mobile like the wind, they belong to the nations. They need no passport.

People write their addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange existence.

They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting and dirty and dying.

What is the vision?

The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes. It makes children laugh and adults angry.

It gave up the game of minimum integrity long ago to reach for the stars.

It scorns the good and strains for the best. It is dangerously pure.

Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.

It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.

This is an army that will lay down its life for the cause.

A million times a day its soldiers

choose to lose

that they might one day win

the great 'Well done' of faithful sons and daughters.

Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night. They don't need fame from names. Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: "COME ON!"

And this is the sound of the underground

The whisper of history in the making

Foundations shaking

Revolutionaries dreaming once again

Mystery is scheming in whispers

Conspiracy is breathing…This is the sound of the underground

And the army is discipl(in)ed.

Young people who beat their bodies into submission.

Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms.

The tattoo on their back boasts "for me to live is Christ and to die is gain".

Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes. Winners. Martyrs. Who can stop them? Can hormones hold them back?

Can failure succeed? Can fear scare them or death kill them?

And the generation prays

like a dying man

with groans beyond talking,

with warrior cries, sulphuric tears and

with great barrow loads of laughter!

Waiting. Watching: 24 – 7 – 365.

Whatever it takes they will give: Breaking the rules. Shaking mediocrity from its cozy little hide. Laying down their rights and their precious little wrongs, laughing at labels, fasting essentials. The advertisers cannot mold them. Hollywood cannot hold them. Peer-pressure is powerless to shake their resolve at late night parties before the cockerel cries.

They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive

inside.

On the outside? They hardly care. They wear clothes like costumes to communicate and celebrate but never to hide.

Would they surrender their image or their popularity?

They would lay down their very lives - swap seats with the man on death row - guilty as hell. A throne for an electric chair.

With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless days,
they pray as if it all depends on God and live as if it all depends on them.

Their DNA chooses JESUS. (He breathes out, they breathe in.)

Their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.

Their words make demons scream in shopping centers.

Don't you hear them coming?

Herald the weirdos! Summon the losers and the freaks. Here come the frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes. They walk tall and trees applaud, skyscrapers bow, mountains are dwarfed by these children of another dimension. Their prayers summon the hounds of heaven and invoke the ancient dream of Eden.

And this vision will be. It will come to pass; it will come easily; it will come soon.

How do I know? Because this is the longing of creation itself, the groaning of the Spirit, the very dream of God. My tomorrow is his today. My distant hope is his 3D. And my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking great 'Amen!' from countless angels, from heroes of the faith, from Christ himself. And he is the original dreamer, the ultimate winner.

Guaranteed.

Something I should have posted 2 weeks ago

LISTEN TO U2's NEW ALBUM!!!!! IT IS GREAT ALL THE WAY THROUGH, BUT "MAGNIFICENT" IS JUST THAT!!! ENJOY THE WORSHIP!!!!! I ALSO LOVE "I'LL GO CRAZY IF I DON'T GO CRAZY TONIGHT".

Tragically Uninspired

Why am I so busy? Why to I let my mouth write checks that my body can't cash? Why do I do nothing for myself? If I did do something for myself, what on earth would that be? Carey said the other day that working out was the only thing that I do for myself, I never thought of that. But I don't work out for me, I work out for my health, so I can see my kids when they get older, so I can maintain an acceptable physical appearance. It is not like it is a release or something I look forward to. I pretty much constantly question if the little bit I do helps anything at all. But I had no witty comback for her assertation, because I don't have anything. I am sitting here jealous of all those people who have something, I am even jealous of the ones who don't have time for their something, because at least they have something.

In childhood, I set my life up around sports, and boy did I love them. It was my release, they helped straighten me up when I was screwed up, they gave me something to look forward to, they gave me easy and set friendships that already had something in common. But now that I am aging, and there aren't really any sports for me anymore. Sure I could go play some basketball, but I never really loved it in the first place. I coach baseball and football, but that has made those into more of a job than a release. I suck at golf, absolutely hate running (and it's not a real sport anyways), and can't really think of anything else to talk about as a sport to turn to. I play fantasy sports for a release and to replace the activities, and I love to play them, but they are not really satisfying. And the friendships are with random people who I never see and really never interact with.

So now I am nearly 29, with no release, and no time for one anyways. And I am not sure which is more pathetic.: I have no one that I really talk to or that I have nothing that I do to talk about.

***************

I wrote this almost 2 weeks ago now...and couldn't post it. This is not a cry for help...this is not a begging for pity...this is not a call for friends...this is just where I am. I do not know how to change it...it is a journey...it is a process...it will be personal...it will not be my doing...it will all be God's.

I will take your prayers. And for that I thank you

Dead

Have you ever just felt dead? Emotionally drained? Physically whipped? Spiritually disconnected? Blah? Head in a fog? That's where I am right now...just dead. Like I am even working to breathe. I know I have plenty of reasons I should be that way...building a home, pregnant wife, middle of a season, building a home, looming budget cuts, challenging daughter, staying up too late, building a home, getting up too early, RUN RUN RUN, a little congestion, and I am sure there is more that I can't think of right now. Even posting this is like excruciating work for me. Negativity is pouring in. Who cares? Why are you writing this to no one? This is like talking to yourself, only more pathetic...Is all you can do is make stupid lists about your pretty damn good life?

God I need a rest...a break...a positive breakthrough...a slumpbuster...a resolution...PEACE!!!!!

What do you say when you have nothing to say, but feel the need to write? What do you do when you have so much to do, but all you want to do is get away? How do you sleep when all you can think about is all you have to get done, or what you haven't done? How do you see your wife awake for 2 hours in a day and spend it talking baseball or (not)watching American Idol? How do you not see your daughter awake at all and think you have time for another one?

Reading Purpose for the Pain, is this my version of being "there?" That place you feel you can't get out of? The one people turn to drugs, alcohol, cutting, self-destruction over? I can see how, I can see why, if those were things in my life I would be turning to them right now. Instead I turn to eating, tv, and I am drawn to other lustful behaviors from my past. For no other reason than...I don't even know why. I know they are destructive, I know they are not helping me, I know they are escapes, but they aren't nearly as bad as the drugs, alcohol, and cutting.

So I sit here paradoxically numb and in pain at once...staring at the pills and razor blades of my life...staring and waiting...waiting for one of us to blink...playing chicken with my deepest, darkest demons...hoping to hold out, afraid I can't...afraid I am not strong enough to carry the load...afraid I am not good enough for the life I have...afraid that if doing my best makes me feel like this why am I working so hard for it...afraid...

This is not a sitcom, it's not resolving by the end...still waiting for the happy ending...still waiting for the resolution...waiting to find the purpose for this pain

Gotta get back to "real life"...back to work...let me find where I set my mask down...gotta cover my pain...before somebody sees...ME

Purpose for the Pain

Haven't posted in a while. Not sure why (other than I am busy as hades). Just started reading Purpose for the Pain by Renee Yohe. These are a compilation of Journals from Renee over the years. Renee is the inspiration for my favorite site, TWLOHA. She was in deep in drugs, alcohol, self-cutting, near death. She was surrounded by friends and people she had never met that pour love into her soul. They immersed her into the love of Christ. She grew up in church, she knew it was there, but she had run so hard from it...But Jesus never stopped coming after her. I am in awe of her writing, so I am excerpting pieces here that really hit home with me. I hope you enjoy...

...But I will keep feeling,
even if it kills me,
because apathy is not living.
--Renee Yohe

...But I won't allow you to reside there
I won't grant permanence to my position
I WILL FORGIVE YOU.
--Renee Yohe

RE-BIRTH
Fear. Overwhelming doubt.
Searching frantically for expiration dates,
to mark the end of this newly purchased life,
when the light will run out.
Tremors. Of hope come and go.
Grasping with all I am,
with the desperate strength of despair,
lest I slip from the life and fall below.
Running, chasing, glimpse of a smile,
Pursuing shadows as fast as my heart will beat,
until my lungs explode
to convince this utopian dream to last a while.
Climbing a burning rope.
Scaling cliffsides to safety,
weary, pulling myself up, plagued with lethargy,
bruised, bloody, and broke.
Thriving. Swimming in a foggy haze.
Uncertain, yet boldly daring,
to mold this new world,
thrusting, in the promise of better days.
--Renee Yohe

A PRAYER
I hurt everywhere, and no where all at once. I feel so disillusioned, yet its catalyst was clarity. Reality shifted through the cracks, a rude awakening. Why would you give me these dreams? You compare yourself to a parent - if your child asked for food you would not give him a stone, these dreams are outstretched arms reaching as the child to it's father, feed my soul. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for my failures, for my doubts, help me not to put you in a box. Mend me, use me, I am yours. Thank you for always pursuing me, even when I turn my back and run. You're incredible, I take you for granted, I'm so sorry. Father, Friend, Shepard, Pursuer of my soul, HEALER, Light. Thank you. I love you.
--Renee Yohe

Salt

In Do Hard Things, they started talking about how we are asked to be the salt of the earth. In biblical times, the salt was what was used to preserve the meat for people to eat. It was rubbed into the meat to slow the process of decay. But the only way to slow the process of decay was to be rubbed into the meat, to be spread out over the decaying flesh. It wasn't done by just the act of being salt, it had to be put to work. It had to be removed from the comfy spot next to all the other salt crystals...it had to be spread out from the others it had spent time with to be useful...we have to be in the world but not of it.

This is pretty counter to what has been done in most churches for a very long time. We only go out to scream at people that they are decaying, we love to yell and "preach" to them all about their decay, but we refuse to infuse ourselves into their lives. We refuse to touch them and mingle, why do that when yelling is so effective? But to really preserve them, it is messy...it takes throwing yourself in...risking touching others who are decaying, and getting some of that decay on you...it is inevitable, when you rub up on decay, it will get on you, and it will be stinky, nasty, death...but you will be bringing that person life, and life more abundant...you will be helping to keep them alive to fulfill their purpose.

It takes a sacrifice...and it takes strength. The next line is a warning: DO NOT LOSE YOUR SALTINESS!!!!! This is the churches job: retain, refresh, renew our saltiness, so that we may go back out into the smelly, stinky, nasty, DYING world and preserve it for the coming of our Savior. We are to be brothers and sisters to the other salt crystals, we are to help them retain their strength for the battle. There will be some who will be overcome by the death all around them, they will be losing their battle to preserve and will actually start decaying themselves. We need to be after them too.

The church is to blame for the state of our country. We haven't been preserving the meat, we have been preaching at it about the hot fire they are about to partake in (the Grill). We haven't been stopping the decay effectively, probably because we have been refusing to go out into it and get ourselves dirty. It's not wearing t-shirts and buttons for the political candidate of the hour...it is not holding signs and rallies to push our agenda...it is not standing out holding a sign to change people's minds. NOT THAT ANY OF THOSE THINGS ARE BAD!!!!! WE ARE TO STAND UP FOR OUR BELIEFS!!!!! BUT...we are to get into lives and change them one at a time...we are to preserve individuals...we are called to people not politics...we pray to God, not to government...we fight the death and decay by jumping into the midst of it and beating the hell out of it...we are called to preserve and save that one single piece of meat because it is vitally important to our God; then once it is preserved, we find the next one to do the same.

Ok, a thought just jumped on me, so it may not fit into the "flow" of this post. If we are battling a SIN we are surely to lose. Satan is the author and authority of all sin, HE IS SIN!!!!! We cannot defeat sin/Satan in this world...God is coming back soon to do that for us. We are to take on the people, they are created by God and have that light somewhere within them...it is a winnable battle. We are salt, we can preserve the meat...but we are not really able to put out the fire. We need to do our job.

This post was supposed to be about salt and light...I kinda got stuck on salt...maybe more on light to come later...maybe not...

Isaac

Do Hard Things

Okay, so I am reading the book "Do Hard Things" with is a book written by teens to challenge other teens to push themselves to their limits...to not settle for the bare minimums that most adults set for them...to start becoming what God wants them to be NOW...to gain experience...to grow. I am loving it, it is making me think about my teaching and dealing with teenagers everyday and how I can do them a disservice to go easy on them. I need to keep challenging them, and pushing them, and encouraging them to reach out and stretch, for that this the only way they will know their true reach. I highly recommend it for anyone who works with teens or is parenting them. Anyways...

They are currently taking about stepping out of your comfort zone and pushing past that first step. It really is the hardest one. They talked about a cartographer in England who was mapping North America and in places he never went he wrote things like "Here be giants," "Here be fiery scorpions," "Here be dragons." Now I haven't seen all of North America, but I have never seen any of those things in my travels. Now imagine being that next cartographer charged with mapping North America, you would be more hesitant and fearful of THINGS THAT ARE NOT REALLY THERE. It is the fear of the scary things, not the scary things that most often stop us from DOING.

How many times have you not done something out of FEAR that something might happen? Our imaginations are powerful things and we can come up with some real far-fetched concepts and stories that can hold us back from doing things. Does that mean we shouldn't lock our doors at night, or anything like that? Of course not, but if you feel God urging you to do something, if you know that something is right, and the only thing stopping you is the fear of something unseen. You need to overcome that fear and do it. Even when we fail and we fall flat on our faces, very rarely is the outcome as bad as the vision our mind has played out hundreds of times before.

Corrie ten Boom said, "Never be afraid to trust and unknown future to a known God." It comes back to your trust in God...how big is He?...How much does He love you?...Does He care for your everyday struggles? Do you have faith that He will catch you if you fall, or that He will let you fall so that you learn how to take a few bumps and bruises along the way, or just to see that the fall wasn't as bad as you thought anyway. But it takes that faith of the first step...once you have taken it, each on there after is easier...but it is hard to leave the comfort of the boat. Someone recently asked me if I had a quote I could share on the importance of doubt in faith. I didn't have one for them (if you do, leave it as a comment, I would love to read it)...but here are my thoughts on it...If there is no doubt, there is no room for faith in God. I have never met a person who had put every bit of their flesh and "rational" mind aside enough to have NO doubt when they are stretching themselves, it may be minor or just a little glimmer, but there is some doubt there. If there isn't are you really trusting Him? If you could do it on your own without God's help, then your faith is in you and not Him. So if you are stretching and pushing and growing and trusting, you are doubting, but you are also defeating that doubt. That is the important part. Mark Twain said "Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear-not absence of fear." The same is true for faith and doubt.